Found out that another reason he has gone quiet, and is less interested is that he has found a new friend. I don't begrudge this, as i want Rawk to be happy. I just wish i had a close friend of my own.

No, i am happy for him. When he isn't being mean, he is a nice guy, and deserves to be loved up. He spends so much time with his ex, and presumably listening to his ex talk about his new fella, that this would be good for him.

But....oh...how i feel as if i am always on the outside looking in.

I will miss him when he is gone, but i won't get another hosuemate... i just need to make a friend, or more to try and fill up the empty days.

All of which makes me very self-centered, i know.

And i don't want ot be self-centred, but i guess so many many years on my own kind of makes me a bit that way.

Oh well, i hope i can get goodbye drinks on Friday. He was supposed to be coming to a quiz with me this evening, but isn't responding to texts or a phone call. I think that that's the thing that hurts most...