Well no surprise that Blondie didn't phone me, but at least now i was expecting that he wouldn't - so no puzzlement on my part.

It still makes me sad that we don't speak properly anymore. Everytime i mention it, well whem i msn him that he never answers.

This morning he came in and just loked so happy, it nearly killed me. I am truly happy that he is happy and has a boyfriend that he loves. But i am unhappy that my friend is gone. And to be fair most of the time Orion never gets in touch with me, it's always the other way around.

I need a good friend of my very own.

I guess it's because i care so much, that it makes me jealous and frustrated that he doesn't care at all.

I've sent Orion a text about Tuesday. I suspect that he will back out. So i am trying to steel myself as best i can.