So where were we?

Frankly things are weird and strange enough without me trying to explain them.

Accordingly to Blondie things aren't right between us, but he will sort them out. Or not. Not sure how long i'm willing to wait really. I have a forgiving nature, and although the things he's said to me hurt, and still make me doubt myself.... he is forgiven. But the reverse isn't true. Did he thank me for his card and present....no.

Apparantly he will only come to my birthday if he is back with Orion. Which makes me feel so special.

I do feel honoured though that so many other people want to come and celebrate with me. Why should i let this one person make me feel so bad. Partly, i think it is the guilt... yes i said things i shouldn't have. But then so did he. And he lied.

I ask myself why do i want to be friends with him....and i can't come up with the answer.