So anyway i went to Gorsley. My tent got pitched with a little help, next time i just know not to worry, and that it will stand when the guys are in. It was snug, and was just the right size. However, i had trouble sleeping. Clearly i am getting soft in my old age, and i'm going to have to invest in some kind of mat. Not an air bed, but several people had these self inflating mats, which they claimed were quite comfy...

The festival was great. There was a really inspirational speaker, Louie Giglio, who completely changed my life.

I have been struggling for a long long time, angry with everyone and everything in that quiet repressed way that only the English have! What he had to say really helped me, and i'm trying to get back to my faith again.

I'm finding it hard though, away from Gorsley. It seems often that in the church there is no place for you if you are over 30, female and single. I'm too old for youth events, although i feel very young and immature, for women it then seems either week day meetings (well, i'm working so i can't go), or meetings for the retired, or toddler groups. I long to find somewhere that would accept me. I feel as if i have wasted the last five years. I could have been branching out and going to places like Taize, and...and... i have to stop looking at the past and regretting it.