Haven't I always said I have the best readers? In response to Steve's comment - I actually told him that I didn't like to have texts or messages like that and his rely was that he had never met anyone so sensitive and that as an adult he didn't feel he should have to watch what he said!

I am truly glad that this isn't a general view, and that there are still men out there who have respect and show politeness!

Hurrah!

Doesn't it make the guy who can't spell a much nicer bloke? I think i'll email him today!

Ooooh I had my first session with Leanne last night. My legs felt like jelly at one point, but i don't hurt today thank goodness. That's probably due to have a good stretch out. It's very different having someone stretch you to trying to do it yourself.

Apparently I am very flexible!

Ok gentle readers, if you were (or indeed are a woman) and some bloke that you hardly know mentions the word rape to you. Would you be offended?

Well, anyway i was. But apparently it's an everyday thing and is ok for discussion between two adults who don't know each other.

To me it isn't. and this same person has apparently never met any other woman who would be upset by it. So this makes me feel as if i am so different from everyone else.

I am glad that i have this blog, as it gives me a chance to just write about all this, instead of bottling it up and making myself very depressed.

I try not to think that maybe this is normal, and indeed i will never find anyone who would be a gentleman and not bring things like that up, even as a joke, until he knows me a bit better. Maybe it's hopeless.

I would like firstly to give a big shout out to Lewis who left a comment about my tree. I contacted the council, and i don't have a preservation order. They also gave me a list of council-approved tree surgeons who will give you a free quotation!

So my next steps are to finish mowing the lawn (hope the weather holds out!) and then give one a ring next week.

The council also tried to encourage me to keep the tree, but i hope to replace it with a much smaller, and more attractive looking specimen. Maybe something like a cherry tree. I think that when this is done, i will try my hand at designing. But i think i will proably still need to hire someone to help as parts of it will be beyond me.

I did a little more Latin last night after Body Balance. After starting TMA03 on sunday and realising that some of it comes from section 4A, i have decided to get on with that section and then return to the tma. As the tma isn't due until July, i don't feel too bad. But after Balance, i just wanted to sleep. Fortunately, the grammar exercises i did do weren't too bad.

I just cannot get the hang of participles (parts of section 3 of the book). So i have dug out Peter Jones' "Learn Latin" book, and i hope that having it explained in a different way will help.

Oh how i wish i had kept my old school exercise books!

Sometimes i wonder about my attitudes to some things. I registered with dating direct, and have had a short conversation with someone on there. But his words are badly spelled eg (internal sunshine instead of eternal sunshine!) and I find it a bit off putting.

I don't know...

I spent most of Saturday stressed and depressed. It wasn't good. Despite that, I got the back lawn mown.

Sunday I did most of the front lawn, and now just need to work up the courage to phone a gardener. I know it sounds silly, but I have little confidence over the phone. But i do want the tree in my front garden removed. And tidying up. Plus - The fence which is behind my tree has been broken! It looks like someone has careered into it. I would like a realyl lovely iron one, in the same vain is the council properties...

My personal trainer is called Leanne! She's completely mad and Welsh and my first proper session is on Thursday!

I forgot to mention. I bought a carpet for my study, but it's in Belgium. Don't ask why.

I also bought two large storage boxes from IKEA. One is for my winter/ski clothes and the other...well i don't know about that yet. They are very large which is both a good thing (plenty of neat storage space) and a bad thing (where will they go??).

Several people in my guestbook have mentioned that Sam had only 4 songs that she played. I think the other two were: Stephanie Says by the Velevet underground (i remember this as a fellow SSNP fan was called Stephanie!) and Natie New Yorker by Odyssey.

What do other fans think? Why not put it in my comments??

That was a subtle hint, by the way.

It's been ten years since i left KEHS. Live is definately not how i pictured it. The dreams I had for myself have basically gone. Sometimes I give up all hope, and other times I am positive and at least try to attain those things that are closest to my heart.

A home, a husband, children, a career!

A big shout out to the person at Staffs uni, and the person at Chester College who are reading Adorable!

Karting was ok. I had a lot of trouble reaching the pedals which meant that my legs were at full stretch and hence got tired very quickly. Ny back and shoulder and arms ache today and believe me a 15 minute stint was enough! Shall i go again? I'm not sure...

Adorable! Now with added comments!

So what have I been up to. Well, I've been more positive and signed up with datingdirect.com. I do deserve to meet someone special, someone who will treat me with respect.

I really, really need to redesign the entirety of littlebluenothing. I wonder if the OU do short courses in web design, because i could do it as a part of that and get credit!

Or maybe i should just not doing a course over the winter and concentrate on updating the site?

I bought a hammock from Asda on Saturday, and gave up on putting it together. I returned it on Sunday and bought a string-type hammock from Argos. It was lovely.

While it lasted. Being so big, the hammock is now very stretched and mybottom touches the grass when i sit on it. I think that i should buy myself a lovely new proper hammock when i have lost two stone.

Oh how i enjoyed lying in the sun with a book, gently swinging. It was a marvellous feeling.

Oh - I'm getting a personal trainer! Not every week, but enough to get me kick-started.

It's been a long time since i've written a proper update.

So what have I been up to?

I've been studying very hard, which takes up so much of my time. Marcus has his 3rd birthday, and he brings a smile to my face and joy in my heart whenever i see him.

There is nothing that can help you to rediscover the wonder of life as much as seeing it all afresh through the eyes of a 3 year old!

I thought i found someone, but he sent me a text with nasty things in it. It distressed me greatly, and i know that he is not right for me. I want someone who will treat me like a princess, as I believe that i truly deserve to be treated in that manner, rather than as a free whore.

I am coming to the slow realisation that my dream of a husband and children will not happen. It is extremely saddening, but there are many useful things that I can do with my time.

I have ordered a carpet for my study, and hope to finish this room off in the next month. Then i will look to ordering carpet for my bedroom and finish that off over the summer. Then hire someone to strip and wallpaper the 2nd bedroom....and so on! It never ends.

But i am tired of being ashamed of my house, and hope to have a lot done by exam time!

I completed 2003 annual return for the OUSA WM RF. Given my maths skills and confidence, this was a great challenge, and a real boost to me.