I'm actually beginning to feel physically sick. I found a building society cheque book, so i can pay the deposit all by cheque now (although i just rang the solicitor and he wants a bankers draft, but that just isn't possible). The solicitor doesn't accept visa (as i thought) so i just have to start praying now that the pin number for my credit card comes through soon!

I've been having a very nice conversation about banks via email with reader Adrian. See, i do have the best readers!

I had a bit of a freak out last night. I found a message on my mobile phone from Friday from the estate agent wanting me to go to my solicitor and pay the deposit and sign things. My freak out was because it's going to take me a while to get the money because i'm away Wednesday and Thursday. And then i started panicking about paying the solicitors fees because i want to pay them via credit card, but i'm assuming that he won't accept that as a form of payment.

Since i've just ordered a new credit card, i don't have all the things i need for it yet (like cheque book or pin number), so i'm slightly panicking about having all that in time.

Since the thing that stresses me most is money, this is a very difficult time for me. I decided that i'm going to pay for the two holidays on credit card (spice accept it, so that's not a problem), the extra 200 quid for the deposit and this months mortgage i am ok with paying because i did a lot of hours (practically a whole weeks worth!) in August (or was it July, i lose track on when they pay overtime!).

The solicitors fees come to 1200 pounds, and i simply don't have that kind of money to hand, and i would rather put it on my credit card so that i can slowly pay it off. So i am hoping that either the solicitor does accept it, or that the pin comes through quickly so that i ca, withdraw it at a cash machine.

The same also holds true for my deposit which (when it is transfered into a current account) can be accessed via a visa debit card. I doubt he will take that so i either have to withdraw it all and put it into a current account which has a cheque book, or withdraw it in case and give the cash to the solicitor. Not very acceptable to me (and also may mean that i have to ask the building society in advance for it) since i don't want to walk around with several thousand pounds in my pocket. I don't know how that is going to work...

I didn't win the Guardian's best weblog, but then again although it's published through blogger it's definately a journal and not a blog. And i think i much prefer this to be a cult thing, my readers may be few but they are wonderful people!

Wow - how long has it been since i posted a Fridayfive?

1. What are your favorite ways to relax and unwind?

Good question. I love to read and listen to music. Driving along in the car singing at the top of my voice is very relaxing! I also enjoy playing on my playstation or computer, letting my imagination take me into a completely different place is good for helping me to forget worries and relax.


2. What do you do the moment you get home from work/school/errands?

I either try and go to the gym, or run myself a lovely warm bath and lie in it for ages reading a book.


3. What are your favorite aromatherapeutic smells?

Lavender and Freesia.


4. Do you feel more relaxed with a group of friends or hanging out by yourself?
I think it depends on the friends!


5. What is something that you feel is relaxing but most people don't?
Probably playing on my playstation!

I was at the gym last night when i saw an Old Edwardian. She blanked me completely...oh well. It starts to happen really when you are like me and don't exactly achieve what The School expected of you (ie i don't have a high powered Professional job, and i'm not not married). Still...

On the other hand though i got an email from James, he is also a Christian so i couldn't help wondering if this is yet another nudge

Despite all the money worries, i'm getting quite excited about moving into my own home...i'm also realising that i'm wanting everything now. I could only have that luxury if i was getting married, but since i'm not, i'm going to have to buy everything myself. But at least it means i'll get the look i want.

Did the earth move you you? I certainly felt it last night (around 5 minutes to 1am), because i don't live that far from the epicentre. It wasn't as strong as around there, naturally, but it lasted strongly for a fair few seconds and then a longer milder quake after that. It woke mum, my sister and myself up, but i didn't wake up during the aftershocks. We stared out of the windows to see if any lights came on down the street, but the neighbouring houses stayed dark.

My first thought was that someone had tried to ramraid the house. My second thought was...how? Since we have three cars on the drive, it would be pretty difficult to do that, and the back of the house is impossible to get in it. I then knew that it was an earthquake and waited for the shaking to stop.

I must have got to sleep after that, but i don't feel very rested.

I do, however, feel more in control of my spending. I put Ms Money on my PC and am starting to track what i spend. I think that this will be a really good way of making sure that i don't spend too much on crap, and that when i do want things i will have thought about it. Spending 40 pounds on magazines and cards each month is stupid. And i think doing it now, before i move house is a good start. I had hoped to have a littlt bit of savings, but i don't think that's likely now. At least i will have something though.

I think that a keep fault in my personality is control. I hate lack of it.

ARGH! I just found out that petrol near work is a penny cheaper. I don't believe it! I think that this Friday i will try and fill up a full tank on Leamington. Sure it's only a Penny, but when you spend as much on Petrol as i do...it adds up.

Oh dear - my money troubles have got slightly out of hand. I owe about 3k in the next 2 months. Mum is going to help me with 1 grand of it, but it's still a lot of money.

I do have some savings, and i feel happier about using the savings for part of what i owe (money for two holidays)..but i just don't like debt and i don't like owing so much money.

It's understandable given my family's history. And also understandable given that'll i'll be a single girl on my own (no one else to help out).

I know that i also have a bad habit of spending more than i really should. I have a copy of Ms Money and i have decided that i am going to keep a much closer track of everything. I've also made the first step into looking for better rates on my accounts by applying for a smile card. The rate is massively better than my HSBC one, and i should be able to get 0% rate for the first 6 months (need to transfer by the 30th though, but the guy on the helpline said that i had started my application "in good time") but even if i don't, the rate is still a lot better. And i get cash back too.

My next step, after moving, will be to change bank accounts. I definately need something with a better interest rate.

Actually doing something positive about debt makes me feel a lot better. I had a lot of ideas about things i wanted to buy for my house, but i think that they will wait. Yes, a widescreen telly would be lovely...but i have a good portable one. TIVO? I have a decent video recorder. Redecorating? It may not be to my taste, but it's got carpets and wall coverings.

I can and will cope, i'm young and resourceful.

So i met the guy. I thought that he was quite cute, but his politics...wel let's just say that he's riht of centre and was a member of an illegal political party at university. I don't think that i need to go into further details on that score. Plus, i didn't feel that there was a spark and whilst i am serious but do like to laugh, he didn't seem to find anything i said amusing. On to the next one i guess!

It seems like it has been a long time since i have update, but never fear my adorable ones, i am still here.

I have been busy, busy arranging a date for tonight with someone from club sirius (who is also a spice member), busy thinking about my faith and how i want to get more involved in the church again, busy fretting about where i am going to get the money from to pay for solictors...

On the savings front, i have decided that when i need to pay my deposit and solictors fees, i am going to close my nationwide savings account down. But i don't know where i am going to go to yet, i think i need to look around some more.

I am currently reading "passage" by Connie Willis. I am really enjoying this novel, so very different from TSNOTD and Doomsday Book, and i can see how some people might describe her main characters as simillar, i actually don't mind!

I had a completely rubbishy day yesterday; and i recognised the fact that part of that was down to me.

I can't be seen by the psych until January (good job i'm not suicidal, eh?) i felt piqued that one of my colleagues jupmed in and took my work...

My car went into be repaired today. I thought that it would take a day. Apparently it could take a week. This is not good, especially since i have a courtesy Ka, which i find extremely difficult to drive. Fortunately i don't have a busy weekend.

The most annoying thing is that i left some stuff in the car because i didn't realise how long it would take. Still it has given me the incentive to get it properly valeted when i get it back. It needs a damn good clean and damn the expense for once.

I probably haven't mentioned this before, but i've got addictded to tapng shows like Trading Up nd Big Strong Boys. WEll, i have to enjoy something now that C5 has taken Oprah off air.

Yes, i know it's truly sad but i think that even the coolest person has to have their nerdy side.

WEll...my lovely sister has got yellow paint over my lovely jacket. I am not impressed.

Of course if i cannot wash the paint out you can guarantee that my mum will insist that my sister does not have to pay for a new one.

On a brighter note, someone has seen my profile on Club sirius and is interested. Of course, he hasn't met me yet. I am a little nervous because of my weight, but i figure that even if he runs a mile it's still good practice.

Since the US are having a public holiday, i am hoping that it's going to be fairly quiet at work. Somehow i doubt it. Anyway, i'm on mornings this week so i am sitting quietly eating a banana and drinking a hot chocolate. The two go together extremely well. I've decided to change my pattern of eating because i am getting quite hungry mid morning, and this leads to bacon sandwiches which are lovely as a treat, but are doing me no good as a regular habit. So, instead of having a banana first thing, i'm having it when i get into work. I'll see how it, and my weight, goes.

Another change i have made is to bring in sandwiches. I've realised how much money i am wasting on canteen food, and if i am going to be paying a mortgage and paying for things like roof repointing (which the house needs according to the survey). Plus i splashed out a whopping 35 quid on an autumn coat. But my, it's cute. So cute that both my mum and sister have said it's lovely. It's a fake sheepskin (real ones, just like leather, really freak me out) but feels like the real thing. Lovely and soft and warm.

Some time later. Well my lunch was ok. But i felt the need to supplement it with crisps, choccie and a muffin. Not realyl the best choices, but there you go. I'm also off body pumping tonight.